The period after the birth of a child is, of course, exciting and wonderful, but it can bring some unexpected and difficult changes in a relationship. Getting up in the early hours each morning to feed and look after your baby can play havoc with your body and your schedule. In addition, the hormonal changes in a woman can affect her feelings and thoughts enormously.
All of this can naturally have a negative impact on the sex life of a couple; however, you don’t need to start stressing out. You can save your sex life, and the pair of you can enjoy plenty of intimate moments after the birth of your baby. Your sex drive will come back over time. Here are some common questions plus some simple ways to wake up that sleepy sex drive.
How Long Do You Have To Wait To Have Sex Again?
This is a question a lot of couples pose, as they simply do not know the answer. Childbirth can negatively affect a woman’s hormonal balance.It can similarly make men struggle with their sex drive.
The presence of the child can result in both partners suffering sleep deprivation and a serious lack of libido. A lot of couples want to know if all of this is normal, and how long they should wait before trying to make love again.
First of all, it’s vital to take note of the medical recommendations. After a regular birth, doctors recommend that women abstain from sexual activity for at least six weeks. During this time, the cervix and sexual organs can heal from any wounds or tears. Strenuous sexual activity at this point could cause injury to the woman. That’s why it’s important to follow this medical advice.
After this period of six to eight weeks, some women may still not feel ready for sex. This is perfectly normal. There is vast alteration in women’s hormones at the time of childbirth. This makes many suffer from a lack of sexual interest for up to several months after the child is born. This actually a completely natural process, as the female body is designed to change and focus entirely on the child, rather than being preoccupied with sex.
To answer the original question, you should wait until you are ready. If, after several months, you still have no sexual desire whatsoever, then it may be time to consult a doctor.Just don’t force yourself into doing something you don’t want to do.
How Are Women Affected By Childbirth?
The most obvious effect on a woman after childbirth is fatigue. The process of childbirth can be extremely long, painful, stressful and tiring. It can have huge effects on a woman’s mental and physical state.
For a few weeks after this period, the body needs to recover, and the woman will often be tired and emotional. Sexual desire is usually at a minimum, but it should return after a few weeks.
How Is A Couple’s Sex Life Affected By Childbirth?
Childbirth can have some unexpected effects on the sex life of a typical couple. If the woman is less interested in sex, and feels tired and stressed, the relationship will not have the same sexual intimacy it once had. Men can also be affected during this stage. They can often feel rejected and confused by the lack of desire in their partner. Men often struggle with rejection and respond with anger, making the problem even worse.
Some men also struggle with their own sexual drives after witnessing the process of childbirth.
The changes in the body of their wife or partner can be distressing for some men and lead to problems with arousal. Men can also feel huge amounts of guilt and stress as they see their partners suffering so much.
Simply put, childbirth can have a massive impact on a man’s mental state. It’s important that he share his concerns with his partner, and he may even need to speak to a professional if necessary, in order to recover from this ordeal.
10 Ways To Get Your Sex Life Back On Track
Women can suffer from serious emotional and physical problems after childbirth. It is imperative to remedy this condition in order to recover their pre-childbirth levels of sexual desire and activity. Fortunately, we have listed below 10 of the best ways for you to recover your libido after having a baby. Here are some simple ways to maintain the sexual intimacy of your relationship during this difficult time. Go through these tips and follow them in order to get your relationship back on track:
1. Don’t Waste Time Worrying About Your Bodily Changes
For women, body comparisons are a huge and frustrating part of life. Whether we are comparing ourselves to celebrities, friends or even our own bodies from years gone by, this whole process is stress-inducing and pointless.
Too many women spend hours on end fretting about how their body has changed after having a baby. It’s not easy to see that you might have added on some weight or gained a few stretch marks.Unfortunately this is all part of the sacrifice a woman has to make in order to have a child. What’s done is done, and you have to do your best to accept it. You can’t turn back the clock, and you can’t wave a magic wand to get your body back. So, take it for the way it is and start feeling happy about it.
Taking pride in the way we look is the first step on the road to a healthy sex life. Keep calm and remember that after a while you will start to recover. The stretch marks will fade and the weight will disappear as you begin to exercise and eat healthy.
2. Don’t Expect Too Much Too Soon
We have talked about the stresses and problems associated with childbirth, and it’s normal that these things can have an effect on sexual experiences, as well.
Sex is already difficult for many women, with a huge percentage unable to achieve orgasms through regular penetration.
After having a child, with all the fatigue and worries and everything else, sex can be even more problematic. Nonetheless, the best thing to do in this case is to be prepared.
Don’t go into a sexual encounter expecting perfection. Realize that you might have some problems. Make your partner aware of this, and do your best together to have a good time.
3. You Need To Talk
Almost every relationship advice article in the world will mention communication, and this one is no different. Communication can help in any aspect, and with any problem of a relationship.
Keeping your feelings and thoughts hidden away will never help.It’s always best to share these things with your partner. The person you love is the one you trust and should feel completely open with.Thus, it shouldn’t be hard to tell them how you feel.
Without communication in this difficult time, women can feel hurt and alone, and men can feel confused and rejected. With communication, the two of you can easily understand how each of you feels, so you can work through your problems together.
4. Keep The Focus On Foreplay
Diving straight into the act can be unexciting, especially for women. This often makes sex feel more like a chore than an exciting expression of love.
Particularly in the time after childbirth, women should spend some time on foreplay, with lots of touching and talking. It can be just the right medicine to cure your sexual troubles and to hold on to your guy into your bedroom.
5. Don’t Think About It Too Much
Now, don’t interpret this next point as “Even if you don’t want to do it, you should just close your eyes and get it over with.”
We wouldn’t advise any women to have sex if she doesn’t want to; however, in the period after childbirth, many women begin to overthink things. This can lead to problems.
Your hormones are all over the place. This imbalance in your mind can make you feel stressed and concerned, when you really have no reason to be.You already have enough stresses in your life and too many things to worry about, so adding sex on top of all that will just complicate matters further. Therefore, what we recommend is that you don’t spend too much time analyzing the pros and cons of doing it with your partner.
Take some deep breaths or do some yoga if you need to, or whatever chills you out. And, then remember that sex with your lover is a perfectly normal thing. As you do it more often, it will feel more normal, and the problem will go away on its own.
6. Make The Most Of Vaginal Moisturizers
The process of breastfeeding has the unwanted side effect of actually drying out the rest of the body. This includes the area between your legs, making it even harder to get aroused and enjoy any sexual activity. Therefore, it’s significant to look after your delicate area with the proper moisturizers.
Make use of some gentle lotions to keep you healthy and moist down below. This way, you and your partner will be able to enjoy some fun without the worry of dryness or pain. If you’d prefer not to use moisturizers, you can keep a bottle of lubrication handy for any time you and your partner want to have sex.
Vaginal dryness can result in pain and even tearing, in some cases.You need to make sure you are wet enough to have sex before trying anything that could hurt you.
7. Treat Yourself To Some Sexy Underwear
Too many women carry on with their old underwear and forget about buying any new pairs. It’s not just for your man that you should regularly change your lingerie drawer, but also for yourself.
You will feel much sexier trying on some new panties and this, in turn, will make you more confident in the bedroom and more easily aroused. For your partner, the advantages are obvious. He will see that you are ready to make the effort to recover the sex life the two of you once had.
8. Kegel Exercises Make Sex Better
It is now common for medical professionals to advise women to start doing Kegel exercises before and after childbirth.
These exercises involve tightening the pelvic floor muscles that are used when to hold in urine. By strengthening these muscles, women can actually reduce labor pains and have babies more easily.
Kegels can also help with post-childbirth recovery and healing. Last but not least, these wonderful exercises can actually boost your sex life in a big way. This is because they make orgasms more powerful and sex more enjoyable overall.
9. Workout To Feel Better About Yourself
Exercise is one of the best things we can do for ourselves in any situation, but especially when we are having trouble in the bedroom. It has so many potential benefits and can give your sex life the boost it needs.
To begin with, working out makes you feel better about yourself. You will burn calories, work off fat and build some muscle. This will all make you sexier which makes you more attractive to your partner and more self-assured in general. All of this naturally helps out when it comes to sex.
In addition, exercise is the ultimate stress-killer. We have talked about the mental state of most women after giving birth.Therefore, it’s imperative that they do what they can to free their minds and regain control of their lives. By working out, you will forget about your worries, and feel much more capable and empowered.
Yet another benefit of exercise is that it actually helps with sexual performance. As you work out, your circulation improves, along with your stamina and endurance levels. The strength of your muscles also increases. And, it allows you to try out some of the more physical sexual positions and spice up your love life.
10. Never Say You’re Too Tired
New mums are tired. In fact, they are often over-exhausted.The process of childbirth and the ensuing sleepless nights means that nearly every woman in the world struggles with exhaustion in the period after having a baby.However, this shouldn’t be an excuse for abandoning your sex life.
Simply telling your partner you are too tired and leaving it at that will do nothing to help the problem. Even if you are genuinely exhausted, it’s better to at least talk about it and explain the situation to your lover, so they don’t feel rejected. If you are too tired for sex, there’s nothing wrong with cuddling, hugging and kissing to keep the bond between you.
How To Prevent Pregnancy During Post-Childbirth Sex
You have just had one baby and you probably don’t want to go through all of that again right away. Don’t forget to use protection when having sex, even after having a baby. You can still get pregnant in this period, and you can still get STDs, too. Remember to make use of condoms or birth control pills for protection.
A Bonus Recommendation
You don’t need to feel stressed out and even guilty because of your low sex drive. More and more women are turning to helpful products to recover the spark they once had.
This gel works by boosting the blood flow to your sexual organs, helping you get aroused more easily and increasing sensitivity. This also means that orgasms are easier to attain and more powerful. The gel is also full of useful nutrients to help heal and maintain your sexual organs and keep you healthy overall.
Even though there is a new life in your home, you still deserve to feel happy and sexually satisfied, as does your partner, so do whatever it takes to rekindle the spark you once shared. You’ll both feel happier and closer than ever. You’ll be able to enjoy your baby, and your lives together much more, too.