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7 Reasons Busy Breastfeeding Moms End Up With Lazy Libidos  

9 years ago 8 minute read

Breastfeeding is a choice that many new mothers make; however, women are also often quite curious about how breastfeeding will affect their sex lives. Many couples assume that their sex lives will die once the mother starts breastfeeding. There are some truths to the effects of breastfeeding on a woman’s libido, but women should also sift through the false pieces of information, as well.

In this article, we break down the fact versus the fiction. We will explore some reasons why your sex drive might falter during breastfeeding, along with ways to combat your lazy libido.

1. You Won’t Want To Be Touched

The truth of is, most women don’t feel pretty or sexy while breastfeeding. You will more than likely feel physically sensitive to the touch, or you might feel absolutely over stimulated around your breasts. Because of this, you are not going to want anyone other than your baby going near your breasts.

Especially if you are breastfeeding around the clock, you will feel like you are constantly being touched. You might feel tender to your man’s touch, and this at first will be a huge turn off. However, think about this. You are tender and sensitive, so what better than to fool around a little bit?

Breastfeeding and sex can live together beautifully. The secret is to figure out what will put you in the mood, and then communicate that with your partner. If your breasts are sore and tired, then ask for a subtle massage. If you simply don’t want them touched, then say, hey, no breasts tonight. We guarantee your partner won’t be complaining as long as you are still having sex.

Your breasts are not the only physical challenge that will keep you out of the bedroom.

2. You Will Experience Vaginal Dryness

Vaginal DrynessMore than likely, you will experience vaginal dryness while breastfeeding. This dryness isn’t going to help you orgasm, because it could make sex quite painful.

Vaginal dryness, contrary to popular belief, is not an indication that you are not turned on. A woman can have a perfectly healthy libido, yet still experience vaginal dryness.

The problem is, during breastfeeding, a woman’s estrogen levels plummet. This drop in estrogen can cause vaginal dryness, which is typically prevalent among menopausal women,since the drop for them is permanent.

It is not safe to have any hormone replacement therapy while breastfeeding, and most women claim that their vaginal lubrication comes back once they are done breastfeeding. Therefore, this problem is only temporary. There are also many easy fixes for this issue. Over-the-counter lubricants workwell. There are even some that smell nice; thus, you are not stuck with that synthetic, latex-like smell.

You can easily get rid of vaginal dryness, but this next libido killer can only be prevented.

3. You Have A Fear Of Accidentally Squirting Milk

If you are not tender in the breasts or dry in your vaginal area, then you also might not be in the mood, because of your leaky breasts.

BreastsThe truth of the matter is that your breasts will leak. It’s difficult to avoid this, and many women feel like this is a huge turn off. Do know, though, that many couples claim to actually enjoy this. It all comes down to you and your partner, and what you both are comfortable with.

Some women can’t help ejecting milk during sex. Why? Well, the hormone, oxytocin, works to release milk.However, it is also the same hormone released during an orgasm. On the release of oxytocin, many women feel the urge to cuddle, which is why oxytocin is referred to as the love hormone. However, some couples simply don’t love it when the woman’s milk ejects during sex.

There are ways to avoid this, though. If you breastfeed right before sex, than your chances of ejecting are slim. Also, you can always wear a bra and breast pads during sex, so that even if you do eject, it will not be noticeable. The fear of squirting out milk is all too real, but there is another fear that many women have when it comes to sex during breastfeeding that will affect their libido.

4. You Also Have A Fear Of The Saggy, Old Lady Breasts

Fear their breasts will not be as plump and perkyAs if fearing that milk won’t come shooting out wasn’t enough, many women also fear their breasts will not be as plump and perky as they once were. This fear alone keeps many women from feeling sexy.

The reality is, pregnancy affects your breasts greatly. Many women experience alone, even if they don’t breastfeed at all. In fact, breastfeeding will actually make your breasts feel engorged. Your breasts will be full of milk, so they will be rather plump and full.

Once you begin to wean, however, your breasts will begin to shrink back totheir pre-pregnancy size. Immediately after weaning, you may feel as though your breasts are even smaller than they once were. The fact is, they might be; however, give it a few weeks to a month. The fat cells will begin to regrow and automatically fill up your breasts again. Experts claim it takes about six months for the fat in the breast to deposit itself once again.

Plastic surgery
Photo by BruceBlaus / CC BY

The change in your breasts is not guaranteed. Many women claim they see no change. However most state that there is a noticeable difference of one sort or another. Don’t let this affect your decision to breastfeed, though. Studies have shown that it is pregnancy that affects the shape and size of a woman’s breast, not breastfeeding.

The best way to combat this issue is to accept that, with the exception of plastic surgery, there really is not much you can do to fight both aging and genetics.

The makeup of your breasts is primarily affected by genetics, and plastic surgery might be the only option to keep them forever perky and full.

Accept the fact that you have just given life to another being, and obviously this will affect your body. While you should accept this as a fact, there is one big thing that many people assume, which is not necessarily true.

5. You Assume Your Libido Will Be Low

No desire for sexSex is one of those activities that become easier to neglect once you stop doing it. If you occasionally have sex every day or two, then you will crave it. Once you go for extended periods of time without it, it becomes easier not to want it. Therefore, many women think that it is normal to not want sex while breastfeeding; however, many studies indicate otherwise.

Many studies prove that half of all women who breastfeed actually have an increased libido while breastfeeding. Some women claim to have no desire for sex whatsoever, and others notice no difference. All women vary, but there are a few facts involved.

The amount of estrogen lost during pregnancy is essential, so that a woman doesn’t ovulate. This low amount of estrogen does affect a woman’s sex drive. Not only will it decrease vaginal lubrication, but it can also work to decrease desire, as well.

EstrogenThe best solution to this issue is to just go for it. If there is even an inkling inside of you tingling for sex with your partner, then act on it. Don’t assume that it is normal not to have sex while breastfeeding.

You might decide to breastfeed for a year or two, and certainly you and your partner can’t go that long without sex. No one has ever had sex and thought, man I really shouldn’t have done that. Well, maybe they have. But, we promise the reasoning was not because they were breastfeeding.

There is one big factor that might keep you from having sex. Find out to see if it’s affecting you, too.

6. You Will Be Exhausted

physically draining activity
Photo by Oleg Sidorenko / CC BY

Parenting is a physically draining activity. Let’s face it, babies and children are pretty needy. While we want to devote our entire lives to helping them, when we do find some free time, we just want to rest and relax. You simply will not have the energy to hop into bed. Especially for women who have to get up at all hours of the night to breastfeed.

They might feel like a zombie during the day, and zombies certainly are not very sexy.As if feeling like a walking zombie is not enough, not sleeping very much can cause physical symptoms that can affect your sex life, as well. The lack of sleep can also cause headaches, and we are all familiar with the age-old headache excuse.

The best way to make sure your lack of sleep doesn’t create a lack of sex is to sleep more. That’s easier said than done, right? Well, if your partner wants to have sex too, both of you should work together in order to ensure that everyone is receiving adequate rest.

Surely, a well rested mommy is more likely to want to have sex.

7. Stretch Marks, Floppy Skin And Extra Fat

Stretch Marks
Photo by Patrick Fitzgerald / CC BY

Last but not least, many women will be self-conscious over their appearance after having a baby. There might be some extra skin, a few stretch marks, and a little extra weight packed on from pregnancy.

The most important thing to remember is that your partner chose you. You two have created a beautiful human being together.

If your partner can commit to that with you, then they love you enough to not even notice your stretch marks or extra weight. Over time, your skin will tighten and those pounds will melt away, but for now, you still need to love yourself and enjoy life. After all, you created a beautiful new life, so enjoy every moment.

Breastfeeding and pregnancy can wreak havoc on a woman’s sex life. Don’t let this happen to you. Consult the help of a natural yet effective supplement that will not hinder your baby’s nutrition, while still helping you get your libido back on track. Supplements from can help, yet they contain natural ingredients.

Don’t let this fantastic change in your life change your sex life for the worse. Get back in bed today, after you breastfeed, of course.